On Interactions with People

     Our third group of campers has left, and our fourth group is already here. I started engaging more with the campers from the last group. We went on a hike up Seneca Rocks in West Virginia. Once on top of the peak, we sang worship songs and marveled at the power, creativity, and beauty of our Lord. (I will try to upload some pictures and maybe a video later.)

     While we were eating lunch at the park there, one of the girls from the group approached me and started up a conversation. Talking with her made me realize that I'm not just here to volunteer in a kitchen for the summer, but that I am privileged with the task of aiding the Lord's work in the hearts of every person who walks through the doors of our Lodge. I also realized that in order to do that, I have to offer more of myself than just a smile in the lunch line; I have to be intentional about seeking out opportunities to connect with the campers. If I hope for them to be vulnerable with the Lord and with me, then I too must be vulnerable with them.

      After a girls' day, we had a Bible study in which one special woman shared her testimony. She had been quiet and somewhat reserved throughout the week, and had at first been unwilling to share because she didn't like talking to groups. The Lord impressed upon her that she should, however, so she submitted. God used that to speak to many of the girls, including me. I was reading Philippians 1 again recently. In verses 12-20, Paul is saying that if being in prison (experiencing trials) would ultimately benefit those around him spiritually, then he is glad to endure it for the greater progress of the gospel. Some of the struggles the woman had shared about I had similar experiences with, so while girls were waiting to talk to her about their lives, I decided to try to talk to one particular girl. She was unwilling at first, but as I started sharing things in my life, she began to open up to me. We found we have a lot in common, starting with our name and going from there. That conversation ended up lasting for about an hour and a half, and I am very grateful for it.

     One thing I keep praying is that God would help me to see people as people. That probably sounds a little silly. I forget that others have struggles, doubts, insecurities, and feelings just like I do. I always assume that I am the only one who is broken, that everyone else has it together. But if that were true, then Jesus would not have had to die. Truth is, no one has it together, and everyone needs to be loved and shown grace. But I forget. I want to see people as Christ sees them. I want to love as Christ would. And I have to give of myself in order to do that. Because every single person has been purchased with the most valuable currency; the blood of Christ. They are precious to Him, and they should be to me, too.

Thanks for reading,
~Sarah

Being Broken Before the Lord

     I know it's been more than a week since my last post, but things have been pretty busy around here. Two groups of campers have already come and gone, and a third group is just starting their time here. I've been working in the kitchen a lot, which is enjoyable for the most part. I've also become an expert at weed trimming and push mowing, and I have worked for a few hours on both a turkey farm and a strawberry farm. During breaks, I got to play some games with the groups, including Mafia, ultimate frisbee, volleyball, and ultimate musical chairs.

     I've been having a few panic attacks these past couple of weeks, and while they're awful and exhausting, I have learned much through them. They always leave me feeling broken in the sense that I don't work right; that I don't function as I should. I hate being broken. Sometimes they're so bad that I have to take half or even a whole day off, and I hate not being able to keep up with everyone else. I talked with a friend about it one evening, and she encouraged me to read Isaiah 61 and 62. Those two chapters talk about how God is near to the brokenhearted, and He redeems that which is lost and desolate. That's something that He delights in doing. He is a Savior, a Healer, and a Lover; so I should let Him save me, heal me, and love me. But I have to first be broken in order to be fixed.

     I've always been afraid that I'm too broken for someone to handle; that in my weakness, I am too needy. But, "His grace is sufficient for me, and His power is made perfect in my weakness." While I was thinking about this verse, a song came to mind. ("Always Enough," by Casting Crowns)

          "Your love is peace to the broken,
            Faith for the widow
            Hope for the orphan,
            Strength for the weak
            Your love is the anthem of nations
            Rings out through the ages
           And You're always enough for me."
           
     I thought a lot about the last line. If God is always enough for me, then that means that I am never too much for Him. Here are some other verses I found comforting.

"For You will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it;You will not be pleased with a burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, You will not despise." --Psalm 51:16-17

"Clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for God is opposed to the proud, but He gives grace to the humble.Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you." --1 Peter 5:5-7

"This I know, that God is for me. In God, whose word I praise, in the Lord, whose word I praise, in God I have put my trust; I shall not be afraid, for what can man do to me? Your vows are binding upon me, O God; I will render thank offerings to You. For You have delivered my soul from death, and my feet from stumbling, so that I may walk before You in the light of life." --Psalm 57:9-13

     I just found a song yesterday after having a mini breakdown that has been encouraging to me. It's called "Sparrows," and it's by Jason Gray. I'll end this post with the lyrics.

          "You can't add a single day by worrying
           You'll worry your life away
           Oh don't worry your life away
          You can't change a single thing by freaking out
           It's just gonna close you in
           Oh don't let the trouble win

           You may feel alone
           But you're not on your own

          (Chorus)

          If He can hold the world He can hold this moment
          Not a field or flower escapes His notice
          Oh even the sparrow
          Knows He holds tomorrow

           

          Lean in and it's hard to miss
          Everything can change
          When you make it His
          Oh He wants to carry it
          Carefree in the care of God
          When you let it go
          You'll find that He's enough
         Oh you never leave His love

          You don't walk alone

           (Chorus)

         There's not a single star that's out of place
         There's nothing broken He can't remake
         If you long for hope when you're afraid
         Oh look at the sparrow
         Look at the sparrow

         (Chorus)

Thanks for reading,

~Sarah